In this post, I wanted to share from a biblical point of view what are the right and wrong ways to establish friendships. I might not be an expert but God is an expert and he has given us his Word :)
How to have meaningful friendships
- A man that hath friends must shew himself friendly: and there is a friend that sticketh closer than a brother. - Proverbs 18 v2
To have a meaningful friendship - first YOU must take the initiative and show yourself friendly to others. It is no good saying to yourself that others must come to you first. A person that has friends is usually the one who is open to initiate and cultivate friendships without waiting for others to initiate.
At times we are drawn to Christians who are in our own social class and we shy away from other Christians who we see as "different" to us. This kind of mentality will give you the friends you want, but not necessarily the friends you need.
Jesus was known as the friend of sinners! He identified with those who were socially unaccepted or unpopular i.e. the publicans. In Mark 15 it is said of Jesus that he was numbered with the transgressors. Jesus knew about being friendly...in fact he is the friend who sticketh closer than a brother.
If you want meaningful friendships, then FIRST be friendly to others; the more you do so the more God will bring the right Christian friends to you who will stick with you through good times and bad times.
How to keep meaningful friendships
- My brethren have dealt deceitfully as a brook, and as the stream of brooks they pass away; Which are blackish by reason of the ice, and wherein the snow is hid: What time they wax warm, they vanish: when it is hot, they are consumed out of their place. - Job 6 v15-17
Alright! So to have friends you must be friendly to others. In order to keep friends though....you must NOT do what Job's friends.
It is out of the scope of this devotional to go into the story of Job's friends, but Job himself summarized them in chapter 6 v15-17 as "fair-weather friends"
If you want to keep good friends then you have to be a friend to others not only when things are going well for them, but when things are going bad as well.
When the heat is turned up on your friend, still love that person and stand by them and be a friend through hardships.
Proverbs 17 v17 says "A friend loveth at all times, and a brother is born for adversity."
True biblical friendships are hard to come by. A friend who is there for you through hardships and who loves you is a real blessing indeed. In order though to have these kind of friends you must first be that kind of friend to others.
May we follow the LORD's example found in scripture about having and keeping friends.
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - John 15 v13
Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends. - John 15 v13
God bless
