Me Obey Him ‘vs’ Me Submit to Him

In the husband/wife relationship, is it... "me obey him" or... "me submit to him"? Did you know there is a difference? True... to obey requires one to submit, and to submit means you obey the wishes of another, but the processes of the two are very different.

As basic as I can state it - to obey means to be obedient and carries with it an authoritativeness that says, "This is the way it’s going to be; it is not open for discussion; this is non-negotiable." Whereas to submit, to be in submission to another, carries with it a subdued form of authority that allows room for negotiation and consideration. Submission allows one to have a voice and an opinion, whereas obedience does not allow this considered negotiation.

For example, we are commanded to obey God’s commandments, which are not subject to negotiation or debate... God said it and that settles it. Obviously, we have no righteousness of our own, nor any omniscient power of our own to negotiate any subject matter with our Holy God. God’s ways are not our ways, but we can be assured that He always has our best interest in mind, hence the reasons we are commanded to obey God. (Deuteronomy 11:27, 28; 26:17; 27:10; 28:9; 30:2, 8, 16; 32:4; I Samuel 12:14, 15; Jeremiah 42:6; Psalm 19:8; 119:75; Romans 7:12; I Peter 4:17) But there are also two other authoritative relationships mentioned in the Bible: the relationship of children with their parents (Ephesians 6:1; Colossians 3:20; Deuteronomy 21:18-20) and servants with their masters (Ephesians 6:5; Colossians 3:22). It is both interesting and necessary to note that these other two relationships (of children/parents and servant/master) are to be patterned in much the same way, for many of the same reasons. (Exodus 20:12; 21:15, 17; Leviticus 19:3; Deuteronomy 8:5; 21:18-21; Proverbs 13:24; 20:20; Psalm 123:3; Mal. 1:6; Ephesians 6:5-7; Colossians 3:22-25; 4:1; I Timothy 6:1, 2: Titus 2:9, 10; I Peter 2:18, 19)

 Have you ever notice that the Bible never says, "Children submit to your parents," or "Servants submit to your masters"? There isn’t the slightest hint of these relationships being of the negotiating kind. In all three of these examples, the command is to obey and there is no suggestion of a negotiating relationship, and it is this command of obedience that also carries with it the hand of chastisement (Deuteronomy 11:1, 2; Hebrews 12:7-11). All three of these relationships are based on a superior and subordinate design... but the husband and wife relationship is a unique unity and is designed to be different, hence the reason why the Bible repeats, "Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands..." in Ephesians 5:22 and Colossians 3:18.

In the Bible, it is only with the husband/wife relationship that we see submission and that is because marriage is not to be a domination relationship. (I Peter 3:1-5; Ephesians 5:21, 22) Marriage is about two becoming one flesh, not just physically (bodily) speak, but more importantly mind, and soul; becoming soul-mates. It is only submission that encourages this as a reciprocating relationship which results in the unique unity of marriage (I Corinthians 7:3, 4; I Peter 3:7; Genesis 2:23, 24; Matthew 19:5, 6). And, with this unique unity of marriage, submission does not allow a husband to dominate his wife. He is also not allowed to chastise his wife in any form or manner. Christ set the example of how a husband is to treat his wife, in Ephesians 5:22-33, and Christ does not dominate. Even when God has to chastise a wayward Christian, we are corrected as a child, not a bride. (Deuteronomy 11:1, 2; Hebrews 12:7-11)

Thank you for reading my post, your questions and comments are welcomed.
God Bless,
Jane Coley

God Was Not Well Pleased

1 Corinthians 10:1-5 Moreover, brethren, I would not that ye should be ignorant, how that all our fathers were under the cloud, and all passed through the sea; (2) And were all baptized unto Moses in the cloud and in the sea; (3) And did all eat the same spiritual meat; (4) And did all drink the same spiritual drink: for they drank of that spiritual Rock that followed them: and that Rock was Christ. (5) But with many of them God was not well pleased: for they were overthrown in the wilderness.

Here's a quick thought for you today: You can have God's blessing and yet He still not be pleased with you. Think about all that Israel had experienced under the leadership of Moses, and yet they still rebelled and God was not pleased with them.

We live in a results oriented society, and many born-again believers have taken this concept and married it with their Christian faith. They think that as long as nothing bad has happened, then God is pleased with them. Lets not judge our life based on circumstantial blessings, but based on obedience to God's Word.

The Dividing Line

Lines are everywhere! There are lines in parking lots to designate the parking spaces. There are lines drawn at intersections so that pedestrians know where to cross the street. There are little, but important, lines drawn on rulers to show units of measure. There are lines drawn on baseball diamonds, basketball courts, and football fields to help the players and referees know if the balls, and players, are in or out. Lines can be very important. They help us know where we stand. We are either on one side of the line or the other.

Exodus 32 tells us that Moses drew a line. Here’s why: God’s people had participated in a drunken party and had worshiped a golden calf. Drunken idolaters! Moses knew that God demands that people love, obey and worship only Him. In a very courageous move, Moses stepped in front of all those people and drew a line by saying, “Who is on the LORD’s side? Let him come unto me….” (Ex. 32:26). That day, many crossed the line by standing with Moses and the Lord. Jesus, too, drew a line when He called those from the multitude to follow Him. Jesus’ words make a very clear line: either you are for Christ or you are against Him.

That same line exists today. We must decide on which side of that line we will stand. Many choose to stand on both sides of the line. And for those individuals Jesus replies, “I know thy works, that thou art neither cold nor hot: I would thou wert cold or hot. ¹⁶So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth. (Rev. 3:15, 16). There is no middle ground with the Lord. In fact, for those who try, it makes Him sick to His stomach. Take a stand on God’s side.

Lord bless,

Bro. Harry Shomaker