a price above rubies. 1

this is the first post of a series from 

[God's Gift: becoming the woman my man needs]

The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her...  Proverbs 31:11a. 

Safely trust means to be secure or have confidence in.

While I have heard and read and agree that this entire passage [verses 10-31] is a collection of the Virtuous Woman's entire life's work, this one thought is the crux of her virtue and can only be achieved through daily dilegence. 

All the days of her married life, 

her husband's heart is safe in her hands. 

~~

There is so much that could be said here. Indeed, I have read several books on this subject. 

But I will suffice it to say that if I, as a wife, 

Spiritual Leadership Links

If you sent me an email in the last ten days, you may want to send it again.  I am still catching up with the many emails I get due to all my blogs, and don't want to miss yours.  I was at the Spiritual Leadership Conference at Lancaster, CA.  The conference was a blessing, and I came away rejuvenated with a lot of ideas and motivated to serve in my ministries more.  One thing I really like about Lancaster Baptist Church, is that they share their resources so freely.  I have used some of the articles from Ministry127 here as well as Pastor Chappell's devotions on the Devos side of IFBKJV.com.

They are in the process of loading all the workshops, so you can download them for free online!  There are tracks for pastors, assistants, pastor wives, ladies, men, choir directors, educators, teens, etc.  I really think it is wonderful how they freely share these and many ministry helps at no cost.  They stay connected and properly use the internet as a tool.  Even on YouTube, I find that most of the songs I go looking for there are uploaded by someone at Lancaster Baptist Church.

Here is the link to download the workshops and sermons, and a list of all available workshops to date.  You can even download the notebook we used in class for all the workshops.  If you only have time to listen to one now, the one I most enjoyed from the ones I heard was Sam Davidson's sermon on Tuesday night - AMEN!  http://www.strivingtogether.com/pages/Spiritual-Leadership-Conference-Downloads.html

Sunday Morning—Sam Davison
Sunday Evening—Mike Norris
Monday Evening—Pastor Paul Chappell
Tuesday Morning—R.B. Ouellette
Tuesday Evening—Sam Davison
Wednesday Morning—Bobby Roberson
Wednesday Evening—Don Sisk

Pastors and Missionaries
Learning to Pray—Dan Reed
Instilling Biblical Principles in Your Local Church—John Goetsch
Will Ye Also Go Away?—John Goetsch
Finding God's Grace in Trials—Max Barton
Maintaining Joy through Seasons of Ministry—Jim Schettler
The Heart of God for Missions—Wayne Sehmish
Mentoring Young Men in Ministry—Dave Hardy
The Pastor's Family—John Wilkerson
Encouraging Fellow Pastors—Kevin Folger
Preparing for a Revival Meeting—Lou Rossi
Raising Your Family and Leading the Church—Dave Teis
Having a Resilient Spirit in Ministry—Frank Gagliano
Missionary and National Pastor Relationships—Sogoro Ogawa
Transferring God's Vision to Your Church Family—Alan Fong
How to Stay in Ministry All Your Life—Don Sisk

Happy Memorial Day - Don't Forget Them

Beginning a Military Ministry - Integrating Military Families into Your Church

When military people are saved and discipled they make great church members. They are different than the average church member due to the nature of their work:

• They may not be in your church as long as your average civilian members.
• They must be integrated on purpose.
• There is the possibility that they have been trained in a good military church.
• Don’t treat them as outsiders. Realize their great need and their great potential for the cause of Christ. Below are some pointers on integrating military families into your church.

1. Realize That Their Families Have Unique Needs

• The children—they have moved many times and need to be embraced quickly by members, teachers, and other children.
• The teenagers—the teenagers have made friends and left them on more than one occasion. The best teenagers in the church must reach out to the military teens.
• The wife—she has many special needs. She needs a good Christian friend. One who will be there when troubling news comes (his unit came under attack—or worse). She needs a weekly opportunity for a mother’s day out. Forming a support group for wives of deployed soldiers would be a great blessing. She needs an accessible, loving pastor’s wife. She needs to be offered the opportunity to serve in the church. Many times in a well established church every job is filled by an ‘old timer,’ and the military wife is looked upon as temporary. Make a place for her to serve. Be there for her. Keep in touch with her regularly. Someone should know about the car or any repair that needs to be done at the house. The teens could be led to take care of the yard while her husband is deployed.

2. Remember Deployed Soldiers

• Pray for soldiers privately.
• Pray for soldiers publicly. Call their names in church meetings, Sunday school classes, prayer meetings, and the pulpit.
• Correspond with deployed soldiers.
• Send deployed soldiers gift boxes periodically.
• Lead your people or a class to adopt a deployed soldier and his family.

Extreme Bible Drills

3 New Twists of an Old Competition
Author: Stephen Benefield

Using games is a great way to help information stick with your students. That’s probably why so many Sunday school teachers, youth pastors, and other people who work with kids and teens use Bible drills. In addition to helping people to become more adept at finding passages in their Bibles, they can also generate some excitement in a particular class or gathering. Here in Cambodia, we use a variety of games and activities with all ages (even the adults) to keep people involved, learning, and smiling.

But one of the problems with games is that if they are overused, people will lose interest. If you have quit using Bible drills because they seem too old and stale, here are three fresh versions which may liven up your next class, youth meeting, or even family devotions.

1. Grab-the-Object Bible Drills
The basic idea: The first person to find the verse, identify the object in the verse, and grab the object from a table in front of the room wins the round.

The details: Find verses which have easily obtained objects in them. (For example: a cross, a stuffed animal sheep, a key, a candle, a Bible, bread, etc.) When you call out the verse to the class, instead of standing and reading the verse, they have to look for what object is mentioned in the verse, and then run up to the front of the class and grab the right object. The first person to grab the correct object wins that round and obtains a point for their team. In order to keep the students guessing, put many items out on the table which are not found in any of the verses.

2. Elimination Bible Drills
The basic idea: When a player wins a round, they get to eliminate a player of their choice from the other team, until one team is out of players.

The details: This version of Bible drills needs an equal number of players on each team. If your have a large class, it is best to only play with a few selected players so the game doesn’t go too long. We always have people who are new and don’t really want to play, but they enjoy cheering on their side or their team.

Ask each side for volunteers to represent their team. We usually use 4 players per team, and it takes about 5 minutes to play. If you have the space, it is fun to have the players from each team sit in the front and face the audience. If you don’t have the room for that, just leave them in their seats. Proceed to call out the Bible drills in the traditional way, but each time a player wins a verse, they get to select a player of the opposite team to eliminate from the game. This goes on until one team has lost all of their players.

Bibles for Kenya

The following post is from some childhood friends of ours, I hope you read this post, and help if you can. Fred and Jessica Roberts

I would like to share an opportunity to help my friends, Denny and Angela Madory, to get Bibles, tracts and other much needed ministry materials/supplies to Kenya. They are independent Baptist missionaries sent out of Southwest Baptist Church in Oklahoma City, Pastor Jason Gaddis. They are in the states on furlough now and plan to return to Kenya at the end of July. They have completely depleted their ministry supplies and need to replenish. Mrs. Angela created an event on facebook and I have copied the description here. Below that is information from Bro. Denny on where to send money if you would like to be involved in this worthwhile cause. I am excited to be a part of it and I hope that you will please get involved too! I know any amount will help! Mrs. Angela commented that if they could just get 200 people to give $50 each it would cover it or if everyone that was invited gave 20 we could have sent 2 containers by now! I hope you will consider it and pray that God will meet their need and then see if you can be a part of making that happen. If you would like to read more about the Madory’s and their ministry in Kenya their website is www.dennymadory.com. Last year God did some pretty amazing things in my life and made it possible for me to spend a month in Kenya with their family and I saw their ministry first hand. If you would like to read about my trip to Kenya my blog is www.beyondwhatweimagine.blogspot.com.

“Our ministry in Kenya has been given 3000 Bibles, 2 Million gospel tracts, several boxes of vacation bible school materials, sunday school curriculum, etc... Also, churches all over the U.S. have had "Happy meal toy drives” for kids in Kenya and we have containers full and ready to go. Someone donated a beautiful piano to our church in Kenya. Plus many other things for the work there in East Africa. We have been very blessed, BUT, now all of these wonderful materials will all be left here in America unless we can somehow raise the funds to ship them to Kenya.The cost to purchase the container and ship it to Kenya is 10,000 to 12,000 dollars. The container cost is roughly 3,800 dollars!When the container arrives in Kenya we will be converting it into a building to use at our church.Will you help??? Individuals,churches,etc... anyone can help! If you want to get involved in getting Bibles to Kenya contact us at: Dennymadory@me.com or angela.madory@me.com for ways to help. We must ship the container no later than the first of July! Please post here anyway you might be able to help!We will keep everyone updated here as things progress! THANK YOU!

All donations and support should be mailed to our sending church which acts as our mission board/clearing house. Any checks should be written to: Southwest Baptist Church and then memo the check or attach a note designating to me or specifically such as Madory Container or Madory Sunday School Building, etc.

The mailing address is:
Southwest Baptist Church
Attn: Denny Madory
1300 SW 54th Street
Oklahoma City, OK 73119
www.dennymadory.com
You can contact Denny or Angela or email me (sarahagriggs@gmail.com) with any questions.

Thank you so much for the prayers and support. This ministry is very important to me and I’m glad for those who will have the opportunity to be blessed by being involved.

The Potter's Hands

Jeremiah 18:4 And the vessel that he made of clay was marred in the hand of the potter: so he made it again another vessel, as seemed good to the potter to make it.

Times have been busy and rather painful lately. My husband has been facing some opposition as he labors here in this place. I would love to pour my heart out, to tell you the crazy accusations, to gripe and moan, but I'll refrain. That's why I haven't written on my blog lately; I've been worried my emotions would kidnap my will, and I'd write things that should have never been written.

During this time away, I've been praying, reading, meditating, talking to my husband and trying desperately to make sense of the events of the last two weeks. God has been so good to me. He has taken me by the hand, and led me down a path to restoration and healing. He has not "vindicated" me, He has not, through His word, proven to me that I'm right. Rather, He has used this time to teach me how badly I need Him and how much growing I still have to do. 

Since I am in the habit of being transparent, I would like to bare my heart.I have been reading through Paul's epistles in chronological order. I just finished Philippians, and it is no coincidence that my reading a few days ago directed me when I needed it most.

Philippians 3:13-14 Bretheren, I count not myself to have apprehended: but this one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind, and reaching forth unto those things which are before, I press toward the mark for the prize of the high calling of God in Christ Jesus. 

I must forget the past - the mistakes of the past, the victories of the past, the pain and sorrow of the past - all of it. While I do not think I will ever literally forget everything from my past, I know I do not have to dwell on it. I can bring those thoughts into captivity (2 Cor. 10:5) and retreat into the arms of my Savior when Satan tempts me to think negative, depressing thoughts. I can purposely plan for the future; thinking about the things that I long to do for my Savior if He gives me the time on Earth to do it.

Philippians 3:18-19 (For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, that they are the enemies of the cross of Christ: Whose end is destruction, whose God is their belly, and whose glory is in the their shame, who mind earthly things.)

There is such a thing as people who are so in love with this world, that things with eternal value (souls), do not matter.  People who, I fear, are not even saved. Whether saved or not, they are clearly enemies of the cross. These people are everywhere. The Lord convicted me of two things in reading this passage. The first was, am I an enemy of the cross? Is my "belly" my god? I hope not! I want to guard against that! The second thing was that Paul said "now tell you even weeping..." He wasn't angry at these folks, he was heartbroken! Oh, how wicked I am! I get angry at these people, not saddened! I tell you this in shame.

Philippians 4:8 Finally, brethren, whatsoever things are true, whatsoever, things are honest, whatsoever things are just, whatsoever things are pure, whatsoever things are lovely, whatsoever things are of good report; if there be any virtue, and if there be any praise, think on these things.

When life gets overwhelming and my emotions carry me away into the depths of despair, I can change my thinking - and my talking - to the things that are true (Jesus loves me and is with me no matter what), honest (speaking truth in love is NEVER wrong, even when the truth hurts), just (God is always right and will set things right in HIS time), pure (God's Word is pure, and source of good thoughts!) lovely (My Savior is altogether lovely!), and good report (the souls saved, the souls baptized, the lives changed). There are so many good things to think about, why do I always gravitate toward the negative? Oh! Because I'm a dirty, rotten sinner. 

Philippians 4:11 Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content.

I am to be satisfied with my lot in this life, my place on this earth, and the task God has given me. If the Lord wants me to sit in dust and ashes or in the White House, I should be content and live joyfully for Him. I have failed on this, many times! I often look around at others' ministries, lives, jobs - whatever - and longed to be in their place or doing what they are doing. The truth is, I wouldn't like it even if I could trade places with them! It isn't a "job" problem, it's an attitude problem. When I am looking for the bad, I'll find it, wherever I go. I know I shouldn't compare myself to them because the Bible says that is "unwise". (2 Cor. 10:12)

Philippians 4:13 I can do all things through Christ, which strengtheneth me.

I look at the above list of my "wrongs" and I know I cannot correct all of these things myself. I am unable to will myself to think right thoughts, to speak right words, and to have the right heart and attitude. Christ must help me. And this verse says He will.

Philippians 4:19 But my God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus.

No matter what happens, my God will take care of me. I cannot be separated from His love! As the song says, "Hallelujah, what a Savior! Hallelujah, what a friend! Saving, keeping, loving, HE is with me to the end." Even if I lose my very life, He will guide me safely to my Heavenly home.

I feel as though the Potter has had to break my vessel, so that He can re-make it. The breaking is painful, but necessary. The re-molding isn't comfortable either - my flesh resists the changes He is making - but in the end, it will be worth it. He is giving me a chance to love, truly love the enemies of the cross. I know I will fail, because I have such a wicked heart, but I hope I will come closer than I've ever been before.

Thank you for letting me share my thoughts. I write to you with heaviness of heart and mind; a great weight pressing down upon me that I would love to run out from under, but cannot. I fall down beneath the load, to look over and see the feet of my Lord. I am not alone! He knows where I am, what I am doing, and what the outcome will be.

Resting in the Potter's Hands,

Valerie (The Bishop's Wife)

Influence vs. Control

Influence vs. Control
By Cary Schmidt (published by permission)

Sometimes we get mixed up in ministry. We forget that our responsibility is not control it is influence. God never gave us control of people, their lifestyles, or their choices. He created free will, and gives each individual responsibility for their choices. I fear, out of good intentions, some spiritual leaders cross the line and actually try to control behavior rather than influence the heart. There are a lot of reasons this well-intentioned approach to ministry is really bad:

God Gave Us Influence not Control—He allows us to influence others, but He reserves the right of control strictly to Himself. In ministry, it is influence that we seek, and only that we might use influence to compel others to live by biblical principles in complete submission to the One who truly does have ultimate control. We don’t have control of others—ever. God does. And He loans us influence—through spiritual means. He commands us to be living examples to others, persuading them, not mandating them, to live godly. (”In meekness instructing them that opposed themselves.” 2 Timothy 2:25) We cannot mandate others to live righteously, but we can persuade them to. We cannot push others to God, but we can lead them to Him.

Control Is a Delusion, Influence Is Real—Even if we fools ourselves into believing we could have control, it’s a myth. We don’t. We never have. We couldn’t. We shouldn’t want to. It is a complete waste of time to grasp for the reigns of someone else’s decisions. And if someone actually gave us control, it would be temporary, fleeting, ultimately failing, and vain. We have enough trouble controlling ourselves, much less others. (1Timothy 4:16, “Take heed unto thyself, and unto the doctrine; continue in them: for in doing this thou shalt both save thyself, and them that hear thee.”)

Control Is Lordship, Influence Is Leadership—We blow it when we cross the line of spiritual leadership by seeking control. This is simply lording over God’s heritage, which we are commanded not to do. 1 Peter 5:3, “Neither as being lords over God’s heritage, but being ensamples to the flock.” This phrase being lords over speaks of subjugation, domination, and attempting to control, and God expressly forbid it in spiritual leaders. The word ensamples speaks to influence.

Control Builds Man-Dependence, Influence Builds God-Dependence—If someone actually gave you control of their choices, they become dependent upon you. Wrong answer. They are supposed to be dependent upon God. Spiritual leaders are not called to make decisions for people. We are called to build them in biblical principles that create God-dependence. It’s pretty hard to trust in the Lord with all my heart, if my heart is dependent upon another man. (Proverbs 3:5, “Trust in the LORD with all thine heart…”)

People Resent Control, but Appreciate Influence—Attempting to manipulate the behavior of others, even toward ultimately biblical and good ends, only leads to disenchantment and desertion. A life built upon the control of another human being will ultimately run away from that control in search of a better reason for living. To the contrary, a life surrendered to the control of Almighty God has discovered the ultimate purpose of living!

Control Is for Environments, Influence Is for People—Of course you must control your classroom, your youth activity, your church service. God does commands us to let all things be done decently and in order (1 Corinthians 14:40). Controlled environments allow for healthy ministry and effective influence.

Authentic Ministry Is about Influence—Ministry is about developing a biblical relationship with someone that allows you to bring eternal truth—God’s principles—to bear in their decision making, thinking, behavior, and daily lifestyle. This is influence. It isn’t control. (2 Corinthians 5:11, “Knowing therefore the terror of the Lord, we persuade men; but we are made manifest unto God; and I trust also are made manifest in your consciences.”)

Influence Is Earned not Grasped—If you don’t have influence with someone (if they are unresponsive to your persuasion), you will never gain influence by grasping for control. Seek to love, not control. Seek to persuade—to gain a sphere of influence through a loving relationship—then work within that sphere to enlarge biblical influence and compel that person to live under the Holy Spirit’s control.

Persuade is the biblical word (2 Corinthians 5:11)—in the end, as ministers of Christ, that’s what we are—persuaders. We seek to persuade, through our lives—our words and our actions. We seek to influence others to live by biblical principle under the authority of Almighty God—to give HIM control, not us.

But always use influence biblically. God gives us influence to use for His glory, not for personal agenda. Our influence should direct others to God’s agenda for their lives, not ours. Our influence should direct others to hear and heed the inner work of the Holy Spirit in their lives. Our persuasion must be thoroughly selfless and abundantly biblical.

In speaking with Dr. John Goetsch about this subject he made this statement, “God identifies people as sheep in the Bible. Sheep cannot be driven, but they can be led.” As we lead people, and influence them, we are genuinely building them in Christ. Hence the spiritual decisions they make are not contrived, forced, mandated, or manufactured. They are genuinely produced by the Spirit of God.

The hardest part of ministry is watching people do things and make decisions that you know are harmful to them. God doesn’t give us control of those decisions. But He does allow us influence—the power of persuasion. Seek to influence others with a servant’s heart today.

Actually it’s kind of funny to think that one dumb sheep would attempt to control another dumb sheep. Let’s leave the control part up to God, and do our best to take heed unto ourselves and biblically influence others to do the same. http://www.caryschmidt.com/

Starting Out the Semester Right, Part 1

Have you ever gotten the shock of your life?  I did -- here at Bible college!  Coming from a church that preaches standards, I started to think that my standards were the measure of my spirituality.  Now don't get me wrong, music and dress are important areas in life that need to be addressed, but these do not determine how healthy you are spiritually.

Remember the story of Mary and Martha?  Even though Martha could be awarded "Miss Multi-Task," Jesus commented that Mary had chosen "that good part" (Luke 10:42).  All she did was sit at Jesus' feet and hear His word!  Martha probably juggled most of the cleaning and meal preparation, yet obviously she missed something.

This story shows two important points:  Even though serving the Lord is extremely important, He would rather you spend time with Him than do something for Him.  Also, we can become so "careful and troubled about many things" that we neglect personal time with the One we're supposed to be pleasing.  Being involved in ministry and going on visitation are good things, but don't put so much emphasis on them that you forget the best things.

If prayer and time in the Word are indeed the measure of your spirituality, then how healthy are you?  Do you feast daily?  Are you malnourished?  You might be wondering, "What's the big deal?"  In Part 2, I will explain what exactly we accomplish by having daily devotions.  I'll even answer the question, "If God knows our prayers before we even ask, then what's the point of praying?"  I pray that through this series, you will see how to start out the semester right!

5 Tips To Coping With Loneliness In The Ministry

Andrew Schank

CLICK HERE TO VISIT MY SITE

From time to time, every pastor, missionary, and evangelist faces loneliness in the ministry. In the midst of a crowd, you can feel all alone. After great evangelistic campaigns, and promotions yielding great results, a pastor can feel like he has actually gained nothing but emptiness. How can one deal with these varying types of loneliness? Is there an answer?

Four Weeks of Children's Church - ebook Giveaway

I am hosting a giveaway on my blog for two ebooks, Four Weeks of Children's Church. These books are written by a Fundamental Baptist and are an excellent resource for those serving in children's ministries. Please stop by my blog to check it out.

~Julia @ Teaching for Eternity

How many old Bibles do you have laying around unused?

Bible Senders www.thebiblesenders.info is a IFB ministry based out of Walworth Baptist Church in Ulen, MN Our goals is to send Bibles (KJV), tracts, and other scripture to needy missionaries around the world. We accept used Bibles, good Bible based literature, dvds, cds, etc.

We also have a sister ministry www.afterdeathwhat.com which seeks to produce high quality tracts. All materials are free as the Lord provides.


Visit their Facebook page here: Facebook

Visit their website here: Website

If you have old Bibles, consider taking up a collection of them, and sending them off to be used!